MARCIA at 85

“Prepare as much as possible for the future. But live for today.”

This is the sage advice that Marcia Rowe offers to anyone wondering how to navigate in later years. It’s a sentiment that she wholeheartedly embraces, especially the ‘be here now’ perspective.

Interestingly, this was not always Marcia’s worldview. She experienced considerable loss in her younger years. Her father died when she was only in her teens. Her mother was unable to hold a positive outlook after this loss and that had a significant impact on Marcia. And then history repeated itself. Marcia was only in her 50s when her husband died. Like her mother, she became a widow too young.

Marcia worked hard after each of these substantial losses to pick herself up. She takes a different approach these days.

“It took me a long, long time, but I have really changed. My expectations about life have become more accepting and more realistic.”

Marcia understands what the alternative looks like. Some spend their later years stuck in a web of gloom.

“These days, I have to be positive. Why should I put everything down? It will only make myself and everyone around me miserable.”

There are an endless number of fears in which Marcia could become entangled. Grateful for her strong mobility, clear thinking, and great health, she holds herself back from even thinking about what life would look like if she needed a walker to move about. She won’t go there.

“I certainly don’t want to waste time worrying about it. When my kids were younger, I had things to worry about. When my husband got sick, there were things to worry about. Now, I’m only responsible for myself. I try to focus on what I can really control.”

Marcia’s positive perspective is empowering. She takes charge of her life. Last year, she moved into an apartment in a senior community in Westborough, MA.

While it’s never easy to pack up and relocate – especially from a home enjoyed for over 50 years — Marcia decided that she no longer had the interest in dealing with one more home repair.

Marcia wanted to be as close to her family as possible, and her children made that very manageable. Her daughter and family conveniently live next door to her son and his family. Marcia was pleased to find an excellent housing option in a town nearby.

It takes considerable stamina to leave the familiar and enter an unknown world where others have already established friendships and routines. Marcia is patient with herself during this transition. She is open to making new friendships and knows that it takes time to start anew.

In addition to relinquishing the burden of home ownership, Marcia had to say goodbye to important components of her life that were located near her former neighborhood. For nearly 30 years, Marcia had volunteered weekly at the local Consumer Assistance Office. She loved her work, answering calls from disgruntled consumers and validating their issues. This was an exceptional opportunity for one who had trained as a dental hygienist, but had often wondered whether law would have been a better fit.

Marcia also spent years as a volunteer reading assistant in the public schools where she enjoyed watching the considerable growth that the young students made throughout the school year.

Marcia is taking time to settle into her new location before she decides where to next direct her attention.

With her clear vision of how to approach life…

“…we have to focus on what’s happening today, not on what may happen tomorrow”…

… Marcia will no doubt find an endeavor or two that will be engaging and enable her to continue to live fully.